Thursday, March 07, 2013

Freight Elevator KABOOM

There's a Freight Elevator behind my desk at work. Well established fact. Nothing but a 5-foot fabric-covered wall between me and it, sort of thing. It can get noisy, but most of the time the noises are pretty easy to ignore.

Last week, there was an exception. There was a crash so loud that the floor shook. "Did part of the building just fall off?", P-Ziddy asked.

After a few silent moments, we heard a voice from inside the elevator. He was calling the front desk to report that he was stuck.

Before long, the party started.

Building Maintenance and Security both descended on our floor. "You OK in there?", they shouted to the trapped guy. "Yeah." "Not feeling claustrophobic or anything?" "No."

One of the Maintenance guys chuckled. "Need us to get a doctor for you?" "Sure!", the trapped guy responded. "Make sure he's got a pretty nurse."

Back in the peanut gallery, Big Dawg turned to the rest of us and grinned. "Yeah... He's fine."

P-Ziddy waved his arms in comic desperation. "I'm trapped in an elevator! Send beer!"

After a few attempts with a crowbar, they realized that the elevator door was simply not going to open from the outside. They sent somebody up to the next floor.

Ho. Ho. Ho.
"He's gonna go in through the top of the elevator," Maintenance explained. "We'll get the trapped guy out that way, and then we'll send John McClain... uh... I mean, we'll send *somebody* inside with some tools."

K-Too sniffled and wiped a fake tear from his eye. "This reminds me of Baby Jessica."

Eventually they got the door open a few inches. A Security guy stuck his nose close to the gap and sniffed. "What's that smell? Is that a motor burning?"

M16's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. "Don't let them burn the building down!"

"OK everybody," I explained. "The good news here is that all those existential questions about the meaning of life aren't gonna bother you any more."

They eventually got the mess cleaned up and mostly sorted out. It was a bit like a Die Hard movie, but with less shooting.

Hey, it's never dull. :)



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