Police Report

Sometimes the Police Report has outstanding things in it.

5:54 p.m. — 11606 E. 86 St. N. Goldie’s Patio Grill. Two women reportedly fighting in middle of road. Handled.

I'd like to think this started at the pickle bar. Lady 1 was getting 'sauced on the dills when Lady 2 tried to change songs on the jukebox. She picked a song that Lady 1 didn't like. Harsh words were exchanged. A bowl of sweet gherkin was spilled. A chair was thrown. The bartender shouted at them to take their fight outside.

Then again, maybe there's a simpler explanation. Maybe the fight dialog was something along the lines of, "You ate my burger!" and "Did not!".

Then there's this entry from the same police log...

3:25 p.m. — 12041 E. 96 St. N. F&M Bank. Report of a bat hanging on a wall "right on numbers." Handled. Bat in custody.

I was unimpressed until I got to the end. "Bat in custody". Wow. Do they really think somebody is going to come by and make bail? Who would be willing to make bail for a bat?

I have a mental picture of a bat in jail, running a metal cup across the bars and shouting, "Hey Warden! What's a bat gotta do to get some mosquitoes around here?"

Heh.

Since it's Friday, I'll go ahead and give you a bonus:



Finally, someone has managed to photograph the pot at the end of the rainbow...