Wednesday, March 09, 2011


Apparently Charlie Sheen is more important than the Federal Budget, unrest in the Middle East and the collective bargaining rights of the NFL Players Union, combined. Crazy, huh?

I turned on a local talk radio station to get a weather report, and they were playing clips of recent Charlie Sheen interviews. It ended, naturally, when Charlie shouted "WINNING!" at an interviewer.

Isn't it obvious?
It got me thinking:

1) Charlie Sheen is an idiot.

2) If a proven idiot can artificially boost his confidence and self-worth with a one-word catch-phrase, why can't I? If it works for him, it should work at least double for me.

OK, OK... maybe it'll work 1.3 times as well for me. Let's not quibble over the details.

Anyway, I've picked my arbitrary one-word confidence-boosting catch phrase. Are you ready for it? You skipped over the title of this post, right?

I've got dorkblood!

That's right, baby. Busted-up hinder? It's all good, I'm just DORKING! High gas prices? DORKING! Found another gray hair? DORKING!

You have no idea how awesome it is to be me. I'm DORKING, and you're not.

This is gonna be a good week.



At 9:38 AM, Blogger MetaCow said...

According to Merriam-Webster:

Dor·king noun \ˈdȯrkiŋ,-ȯ(ə)k-,-kēŋ\

1: an English breed of large domestic fowls having five toes or the hind toe double

At 9:45 AM, Blogger jeff.w.mcclung said...

Hey! You got your useless facts in my self-esteem! These are *not* two great tastes that taste great together!

Blogword: "mnacho". Dang... now I'm hungry.

At 12:28 PM, Anonymous ICanSpell said...

The Hind Toe Double is either a cocktail or the name of some silly dance from the 1920s.

At 3:42 PM, Blogger MetaCow said...

The Hind Toe Double is the perfect drink to pair with mnachos.

At 8:45 AM, Anonymous P-Ziddy said...

The Hind Toe Double sounds kinda dirty to me and I really don't want to speculate on what it might be.


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