Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Business Plan

Lunch with Captain Silver Lining is always pretty wonderful. Recently a large group of us went out to lunch, and the good Captain shared his amazing business plan with us.

"Puppy Pile" sounds like something you
don't want to have to clean up
"I want to rent out space in the mall," he said, "and fill a room with kittens. There might be a second space as well that I'd fill with puppies. Because who wouldn't want to drop a few bucks and then go lay in a room with a bunch of puppies flopping around and cuddling them?"

We were all stunned at the brilliance and simplicity of it. "I have to admit, I would totally do that," I said. "I'd be walking around, 'I am a confident, logical, emotionally secure man who... PUPPIES!!!' Then I'd jump into the pile and never come out."

"The only flaw with my plan is what to do with them when they get older," Captain Silver Lining said. "I'd need a steady supply of kittens and some way to get rid of them when they age."

"You'd need a lot of Crazy Cat Ladies," P-Ziddy suggested.

"Pile of Kittens" would be an hysterical
name for a rock n' roll band
That sparked an idea in me. "Just get a sign-up sheet for all the Crazy Cat Ladies. They can volunteer to adopt your older cats."

There was general agreement with the wisdom of my plan. It was time to bust out the "little old lady" impersonation. In a warbly voice I said;

"I'm only interested once they develop arthritis."

Much laughter. M16 joined the fray. In his own warbly old-lady voice, he said;

"Do you have any with broken legs?"

I waved my hand around like a second-grader who knows the answer to the teacher's question.

"Oh! Oh! Dibs on the incontinent ones!"

Captain Silver Lining asked how much we'd had to drink before lunch. I swear, that glass only had tea in it. (hiccup!)


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