Walenfud Cake

Once upon a time, a young boy was minding his own business and not bothering anybody even a little when all of a sudden everybody in the entire world decided all at the same time that they absolutely loved Walenfud Cake.

"It's great!" people shouted. "It's made by amateurs but that's OK because three Master Cake Makers help them and love them and nurture them and then tell them how bad their cake turned out, but *that's* OK because everybody knows that *all* of the Walenfud Cakes are really grand anyway!"

The young boy had doubts. He really only liked chocolate cake, and even then only a little. But the entire rest of the world never stopped talking about Walenfud Cake and how good it was and how fun it would be to make it and how mean the Master Cake Makers could be even though they are really good people deep down and only yell when they've had too much to drink.

The young boy decided that he really didn't like cake of any kind all that much. The entire rest of the world looked at him oddly.

Seven years passed. The Walenfud Cake Master Cake Makers got rich, and the entire rest of the world loved them more and more. Things started to get silly. One of the Master Cake Makers started wearing shirts that were several sizes too small, and never smiled. One passed into a permanent delirium, and the other lost most of his vocabulary. Still, the Walenfud Cakes kept coming, and the rest of the entire world loved them more and more.

One day the young boy was having a perfectly ordinary meal when he looked down and realized that he had accidentally made Walenfud Cake and then eaten it! Oh no! And even worse... he kinda liked it.

Shame kept him silent. But he found himself checking back with the amateur Walenfud Cake makers to see who the Master Cake Makers hated most. He found himself secretly and shamefully checking YouTube to find videos of the amateurs making Walenfud Cake.

The young boy finally had to admit to himself: "I kinda like this Walenfud Cake." Then he wept bitterly, and bit himself on the hands. He never admitted it out loud though, choosing instead to live with his secret shame.

*sigh*

I'm pretty surprised that they voted off Michael Johns last night.