Headlines

I was listening to some TV sportscasters talk about Brett Favre being traded to the New York Jets. One of them made an interesting point: Brett has gone from small media market Wisconsin to the shark-infested chum waters of New York. He'll make headlines simply by setting foot outside the Jets' training facility.

This inspired me to make a few headlines of my own.

Brett Scratches Hinder In Public
Conservative Groups Outraged

Brett Buys 72" Flat-Panel TV
QB admits "I really hate to miss 'Wheel of Fortune'"

Brett Finished All Of His Dinner
6,239th "Happy Plate" in a row sets new 'Iron Man' record

Brett Was Asleep By 9:30 Last Night
Says after leaving WI, the night life just isn't as interesting

Brett Used His Blinker Before A Lane Change
"First blinker I've seen in N.Y. traffic in 7 years" said one driver

Brett Puts On His Pants One Leg At A Time
View obscured, still unclear whether he fastens then zips, or zips and then fastens

Brett Wins Super Bowl...
...in 1997. This year? Got mugged in North 'Jersey.