Heaven-Scent?

We visited my in-laws over the weekend. It was FIL's (Father-In-Law's) birthday. He wanted Fried Chicken for lunch, so that's what he got. They made a pile of mashed potatoes and gravy to go along with it. Lunch was huge and wonderful.

Later, he was opening his presents. He and MIL are going on a cruise to Hawaii soon, and he decided that he needed a new "fragrance" (*not* cologne) for the excursion. He found a sample of something he liked in a magazine, so they ordered it online and made it one of his presents.

When he opened up the package, he discovered it was in a spray bottle. "Let's make sure I can cover this up if I don't like it... It should smell *just* *like* *Hawaii*!!!"

With that joyous proclamation made, he promptly lifted his shirt.

Words... fail me. Let's just say that this is a fairly over-weight 61-year old, and your imagination can fill in the gaps.

Anyway, he spritzed some of the fragrance on his surprising acreage. "Oh, that's nice," he purred. He began to lightly rub it in with the hand that wasn't holding his shirt up.

"Can I smell that?" said my wife's SIL (Sister-In-Law). She was honestly interested in the scent, but she got ... more than that.

FIL jumped up and waddled over to where SIL was laying on a couch. With the shirt still held high, he leaned over her so that she could smell his chest.

There were... dangling bits. I shall carry this image with me in my nightmares for quite some time.

BIL (Brother-In-Law... can you keep up with all these acronyms?) was laying on the other couch, nearly weeping with laughter. After all, it's not every day you see your dad give your wife a free peep show. FIL decided that BIL needed to experience some of the joy, too. He waddled over to that couch for an encore.

"What do you think of the scent? Just like Hawaii, right?", shouted FIL, laughing.

BIL wiped the tears out of his eyes and replied, "Mmmmm... smells like sand and gravy!"

I've marked Hawaii off my list of vacation destinations. It seemed like the right thing to do.