The Dental Story, Part 1

Tuesday I had my first Dentist visit in at least 3 years. The news wasn't especially good.

It did start out well, though. When I walked in there was a framed sign on the receptionist's desk that said, "Welcome new patients David and Jeff". Not only was I already well known in this strange new universe, but I also had an instant arch-rival.

Step carefully, David. My chi is mighty.

I was taken to a small room and interrogated by women wearing plastic gloves. I mentioned that I work for a major local newspaper. "Oh!", said my perky inquisitor, "Then you can tell me why the paper's price went up."

"I need to be able to afford dentists," I said.

She glared at me, hard. Then she announced that they had just that moment run out of complimentary packs of dental floss. I would have to go home without any dental swag. That'll teach me.

It turns out I have a cracked tooth from an old filling that's going bad. When they first told me I was going to get a crown, I asked if I'd also get a scepter, castle, and alligator-infested moat. Turns out, not all crowns are created equal.

Part 2 of this adventure will be Tuesday the 11th. Fillings replaced, temporary crown installed, and I'll do battle with my new arch-enemy. Sleep lightly, David, for your reign of terror will end soon!